A Smile

A Smile

A smile they said was all I’d need
To get me through this life
A smile is all they want to see
Not frowns, or tears, or strife.

I learned my lesson very well
I smiled my whole life through
I even smiled when sound asleep
Or so I’m told I’d do.

But now you say that’s not the way
Just let true feelings show
But I’m so scared, Oh can’t you see
My smile is safe, you know.

There’s so much pain behind this smile
Anger, rage, and self-blame
A lifetime of tears bottled up
Loneliness, fears, and shame.

Would I then look like some monster
Would others turn away
Would my face ever smile again
Or would it freeze in pain.

by annie